


A Web of Lies (We've Got Too Many Secrets)

by mynameisphantrash



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Adoption, Angst, Coming Out, Dan Howell/Phil Lester - Established Relationship, Gen, Parent!Phan - AU, Phan - Freeform, Sad, Set in the future, Teenagers, YouTube, mild swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-05-26 12:47:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6239989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mynameisphantrash/pseuds/mynameisphantrash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ocean Howell-Lester - the name no-one knows. She's an isolated girl with few friends, she connects to a correspondence school everyday, and most importantly is not allowed on YouTube.<br/>She knows her parents are professional video editors. She knows they work in a locked office at home. She knows her best friend's parents are YouTubers.</p>
<p>She really should have put two and two together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

~ Ocean ~

I slowly slid to the floor, silent and unwelcome tears tracking their way down my cheeks. I mean, I get that they have important jobs, but what about it is so confidential that it needs to be kept under lock and key?

 

❀ ~ ❀ Earlier ❀ ~ ❀

“Ocean, honey, Papa and I are going to start working now, so the office is going to be out of bounds for a few hours, okay?” Dad called from the hallway.  
It’s not like I’m allowed in there, anyway - you keep it locked 24 / 7, I thought miserably. “Okay, Dad,” I replied, making sure my tone hit that sweet spot somewhere between resigned and sad.  
“Oh, Ocean honey, don’t pull that on me again! Phil, she’s doing the thing again! You know I can’t handle the thing!” he whined, half hysterical, half joking.  
“Dan, come on! Just ignore it, Bear, she knows we can’t - ”   
I stomped up to my room before I could hear the rest.

❀ ~ ❀ Now ❀ ~ ❀

It was always the same; it had been for as long as I could remember living with Dan and Phil. They’d adopted me when I was four, and even then I’d be put in my room with my dolls for a few hours a week so that they could ‘work’. I’d gone through my fair share of theories, of course. When I was six I was convinced they tested Barbie dolls in a factory because I always seemed to have the newest dolls, even before my best friend Clara - she was, at the time, a model for the Barbie ads and got to keep any toys she used. When I was nine they were secret agents, saving the world from people like the grumpy lady next door. This theory was debunked quickly enough when Clara pointed out that they were still at home when they were working, so, naturally, that led me to the conclusion that they were the computer geeks of the operation, and they had the fancy equipment to prove it.

I eventually found out at age eleven that Dad and Papa were just professional video editors, occasionally mucking around doing their own. I often heard them speaking in cheery voices, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying. Sometimes they’d come out with their faces red from scrubbing, faint black lines on their faces.

I never saw any videos. I knew nothing of what they were doing.

A bloop! from my phone shook me out of my thoughts and I rushed to my desk, hoping against hope that Clara had finally found a good spot to hang out that my parents would approve of.

No such luck. A cheery Correspondence Academy notification blinked at me, informing me that three separate essays were due tomorrow and that I had only watched the revision lessons for one class. I groaned with disgust, but was secretly relieved to have something to distract me from what my parents may or may not be doing downstairs.

~ Dan ~

With a feeling nearing nostalgia, I unlocked the door to the office. I had kept it looking exactly the same for almost twenty years, updating only posters and personal items. All the fans saw was my bedroom, where I filmed my videos. All Ocean saw was a locked door, and limitless possibilities as to what lay behind.

Phil and I didn’t know when to bring up the office and, more importantly, our careers with her. We didn’t know how she’d react to finally knowing the extent to which she’d been kept in the dark. We’d changed our last names to Howlter, although the public didn’t know that. Ocean too was a secret, so we had to enrol her in a correspondence school. We still lived in the same London apartment, and, although the fans thought nothing had changed in almost twenty years, we’d adopted Ocean twelve years ago and turned our office into her room. My old room had stayed the same when I’d moved into Phil’s room so that my videos, and now our gaming videos, were still filmed in ‘my’ room.

I hated shutting Ocean out, but I didn’t want the equivalent of 2012 to happen to her - it had been 21 years and the pain was still fresh in my mind, the ‘V Day’ video still circulating. I knew she hated it too, not knowing what was going on - as she got older she perfected the role of ‘lonely, rejected teenager’ and no amount of makeup could conceal puffy, red eyes. If she found out who Phil and I really were, I think she’d flip out. Hopefully she’d understand that we were trying to protect her from the prying eyes of our fans, but if I was being honest with myself, I really had no idea how she’d react. We’d managed to keep her off YouTube to limit the chances of her stumbling across any of our channels, but I don’t know how long this can go on. 

She’s sixteen now, she’ll find out one way or another.


	2. Chapter Two

~ Ocean ~

I gazed around my room, taking in the overload of personal items. I wasn’t allowed anything in the lounge, ‘cause Dad seemed to work in there every now and then, so basically everything came here - it was like my personal ‘Everything Useless’ room. Was that normal? I’d never had any friends other than Clara. Her life was basically a mirror to mine, except that her parents were YouTubers Troye and Tyler Sivan. They made videos, but again I never saw them because, for some reason, Dad and Papa wouldn’t let me watch YouTube. I guess I was okay with that, but in hindsight I should have put two and two together.

❀ ~ ❀ Later ❀ ~ ❀

I crept downstairs into the kitchen, hoping that Dad and Papa had finished working, but I could still hear voices coming out of the office. I sighed and grabbed a granola bar out of the cupboard. On second thoughts, I put it back and instead reached for my phone, tapping out a text.

4:18 pm  
To: Clara <3  
hey im coming over they’re working again

I didn’t have to wait long. Clara was predictable that way.

4:21 pm  
To: Ocean *-*  
why am i not surprised  
bring food

I picked up the granola bar again, along with some crisps and a couple bars of chocolate. Grabbing my charger and a pen, I scrawled a note to Dad and Papa - a simple ‘at clara’s, back later’ - and left.

Clara’s house was literally just down the road, so I didn’t even get a chance to feel the already cold November air before I was engulfed in the warm air of her house.

“Hey Ocean, she’s in her room,” Troye said as he opened the front door, not even questioning why I was outside their house unannounced.

“Thanks Troye, I’ll be here for a few hours - Dad and Pa are working,” I explained as Tyler walked up and joined his husband. They shared a knowing look - was that sympathy? - so I quickly excused myself, feeling thoroughly confused.

“CLARAAAAAAAAAAA!” I whisper-yelled as I crashed through her doorway into her room. Much like mine, it was littered with personal items, her shelves literally sagging with photo frames. She looked up in surprise from her desk, her streaky blonde fringe falling into her face as she quickly tried to shut her laptop.

“Oh no you don’t, you little…” I grinned and crossed the room in a few steps and yanked her laptop away from her.”

“Nooo… no no no no Ocean I was watching YouTube… you’re not allowed on that, remember?” Clara protested. I smirked mischievously as I unlocked her laptop - we told each other everything, passwords included - replying with, “Well it’s about time that changed, isn’t it?”

Clara paled visibly.

~ Phil ~

Dan was sitting at the desk, editing a video while we waited for Ocean to go to Clara’s - she always did, she was predictable like that. Once we heard the tap of a note being stuck to the office door and the sound of footsteps on the stairs, Dan and I shared a grin as we quickly moved to our room, setting up the camera and tripod with ease.

“Hello Internet!” Dan said with a cheesy grin and his customary salute. “You all know what time it is…” I held up a Sharpie and pulled a face at the camera. “IT’S TIME FOR ANOTHER PHIL IS NOT ON FIRE!” he finished jubilantly.  
“I feel so old, Dan,” I complained. “This is actually our 24th Phil Is Not On Fire.”  
“Yeah, you do look pretty old. I mean - a quiff? You look like someone’s dad!” Dan teased, yelping when I simultaneously shoved him and tickled his sensitive neck.  
“Ain’t that the truth,” I whispered softly, my tongue poking out in a happy smile.  
“Phil! Now I have to edit that out. No fair, don’t do that.”

❀ ~ ❀ Later ❀ ~ ❀

Upload 97% Complete

“I feel kinda bad about Ocean not knowing about us,” I said earnestly to Dan. “I mean, when are we going to tell her?”

A shaky voice emanated from the doorway.  
“Tell me what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol sorry for the cliffhangers (they're the main reason the chapters are all so short, I just love cliffhangers)


	3. Chapter Three

❀ ~ ❀ Earlier ❀ ~ ❀ ~ Clara ~

“Um, Ocean, I don’t know if that’s a good idea…” I stammered nervously. All I could think was not now. Not now. She’d caught me at a bad time - I’d been watching my parents’ old videos, and with me being in the public eye ever since I was adopted, I knew all about Dan and Phil. It was hard not to - they used to do collabs with Tyler at least, so they were both linked to my parents’ careers. I hated keeping secrets from Ocean, especially ones about her.

All that was going change.

I watched as her eyes widened at the sight of a twenty-year-old Troye on the screen.

“How does it work?” she asked. I responded by hitting the spacebar, and she giggled when Troye’s voice started up again, exclaiming, “His voice hasn’t changed at all! How old is this video, though?” she asked, frowning.

“Um … it was filmed in 2016?” I said, but I knew I’d lost her attention as her eyes had resumed flicking over the screen.

Suddenly, she stopped dead, her eyes frozen wide.

“Ocean, what’s the matter? Ocean - Ocean, talk to me!” I asked frantically, trying to snap her out of it. After what felt like hours, she spun the laptop around, and I immediately saw what she was looking at.

Up next was “Dan and Tyler Play NEVER HAVE I EVER”, and grinning out from the thumbnails was Tyler and a 24-year-old Dan Howell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this was a really short chapter but hey you know how I love cliffhangers! mwahaha
> 
> [edit] omg it is really short! lol oops


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oh man the angst  
> i'm sorry if you exploded i think i did writing this   
> lol i love you guys <3

~ Ocean ~

My stomach dropped. It couldn’t be, but the proof was staring at me from the thumbnail.

I clicked on it, my mind whirling. Was this a joke? But when my dad started talking, saying “Hello, Internet!” I just stared in shock. I let the video play through, shaking myself out of my daze to click on ‘danisnotonfire’s channel, hoping that maybe it was just something he did in his twenties. To my horror, there was a video dated - was that last week? I opened it with trepidation. It showed Dad sitting in an unfamiliar room on a bed. The bedspread was identical to the one in Dad's and Papa’s room, except in various shades of black, white and grey. Could it … could that be the office? Suddenly, another person joined Dad on the bed, and I stopped breathing.

It was Papa.

❀ ~ ❀ Now ❀ ~ ❀

“When were you going to tell me, Dad? Papa? You’re YouTubers. Why the hell did you keep it a secret? And WHY DO YOU HAVE CAT WHISKERS ON YOUR FACE?!” The questions kept coming, and I’d had them for so long I couldn’t, wouldn’t halt them. Tears were streaming down my face as I stared at my adoptive parents with disbelief and betrayal.  
“DO YOUR FANS EVEN KNOW I EXIST?” At that, I broke down, sobbing. It was too much. I’d lived my life in solitude, believing that Dan and Phil didn’t like socialising. To find out now that they were famous and didn’t want anyone to know about me just added buckets of salt to a gaping wound. It was a vast chasm; Dad, Papa, the Sivans, everyone on one side and me on the other, wondering if I’d ever cross.

“How many, Dan?” I demanded, satisfied with his flinch at my refusal to call him ‘Dad’. “How many people do we know, do I know, that are like you?”  
“Ocean, honey, be reasonable -”  
“Don’t you ‘Ocean, honey’ me! Don’t you dare! You’ve kept this massive secret from me for twelve years, now you will tell me: how many people do I know are YouTubers and kept this from me?”  
Dad sighed and glanced at Papa for support, who only smiled sadly.  
“Well, there’s Zoe and Joe, Alfie, Caspar … er, PJ and Chris? And obviously the Sivans.”  
Throughout all this my jaw had hit the floor. There were so many, and I’d never even suspected. My eyes narrowed as a thought struck me - if the Sivans knew, that meant … Clara knew.

I stopped crying. Now, I was calm, collected and icy.  
“Why?” I asked coldly. I needed answers, and I was gonna get them.

“Phil and I have been YouTubers for a long time. I met him in 2009 - I was 19 and he was 23. Phil’s been making videos since 2006 and I was a massive fan, so I stalked him online.” At this point, he and Papa shared a nostalgic grin. “We did a collab when we met in real life - that’s the reason for these,” he explained, gesturing at the cat whiskers. “We’ve been making videos ever since.”

“The office?” I prompted.

“Well, back before we got together, that was my room. The fans don’t know much about our personal lives, so I’ve had to keep that room done up as though I live in there.”

“And why don’t the fans know about me?” I looked at Papa.

“Ocean, they don’t even know we’re married. They long ago accepted that we were purely platonic. The thing is, in 2012 -” Papa’s voice cracked as he said this, and I saw tears welling up in his eyes - “in 2012, a video we’d made back in 2009 as a prank that we decided not to go ahead with was accidentally made public in a YouTube glitch. It was a Valentine’s Day themed thing, and the fans went nuts. They got invasive, and … that year was really hard for us. We didn’t do as many collabs, on talk shows we made a point of sitting apart. If they found out all in one go that we were married and had adopted kids - uh, I mean a kid - I don’t even know how much worse it would be. We didn’t want that to happen to you, sweetie, and we figured it was better for you not to know about it at all than feel invisible.”

Kids? Plural? I had no idea what that was about, so I let it slide.  
I sighed, knowing that there was no point explaining that that had already happened.


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um so this chapter is a bit sneaky  
> ocean is a daredevil basically

~ Dan ~

After quickly sorting out the multitude of new rules needed, Phil and I decided to show Ocean our filming process. We made her promise not to interrupt, just to watch if she was interested, and basically absorb.

I watched her carefully as Phil unlocked the door to my room, trying to gauge her reaction. As Phil opened the door with a typical “Ta-da!”, Ocean practically ran and skidded to a halt, frowning when she saw the bedspread. She looked back at me quizzically. 

“This was my old room, back before Phil and I got together. The fans still think that after all these years I‘m still in here, and we just let them believe it,” I reminded her.

“But that’s basically lying! Why won’t you tell them about you … and me?” Ocean exclaimed.

“Ocean - we’ve been over this,” I said warningly, which I immediately regretted. I watched her eyes harden, her brain starting to whirl. This was not going to end well.

 

❀ ~ ❀ Later ❀ ~ ❀ ~ Ocean ~

I watched Dad and Papa with wide eyes. How were they so at ease, so comfortable in front of a camera? It brought out, magnified and streamed to the world a side in them that, although I saw it often, seemed so new … and I was jealous of their fans. I’d always loved this side of them, but the fans got it all the time, had since 2009. 

They talked with ease, making terrible puns and endless innuendos, something I’d never thought possible whilst looking after some old Sims guy called Dil. Apparently they’d created Dil as a young adult, and had been playing for so long that he was now a withered old man surrounded by bunny-slipper-wearing grandchildren. 

I waited patiently until it seemed everything was going well, when they couldn’t afford to be interrupted - and jumped out from behind the camera.

“Hey everyone! My name is Ocean Howell-Lester. What’s this I hear? Are you asking who the hell am I?” I announced to the camera, gauging my parents’ reactions out of the corner of my eye.

“Ocean…” Papa said threateningly. I ignored him and ploughed on.

“I am 16. Dan and Phil here, your beloved platonic brotp, adopted me twelve years ago. That’s right! They’ve been keeping their marriage, and my entire existence, a secret from you for TWELVE FUCKING YEARS. How does that make you feel? How do you think that makes me feel? I’ll just leave you with this: they’ve lied to you.” And with that, I flounced out of the room.

 

~ Dan ~

 

Well, shit. I turned to Phil, whose eyes were still on the door. “Phil - the game’s still running. What do we say?” I prompted him.

He snapped out of his daze and hurriedly paused the game. “Um… maybe technical difficulties? It kind of sucks, we missed half the anniversary party and we’ll fail all the goals! We’ll have to edit it out, though.”

I grimaced. “She won’t be happy if she finds out, will she? But… we can’t just let her out us to the world like that. Maybe if we film a video?”

“I’m not ready for that… not just yet…” Phil shook his head.

“I agree. When the time comes, we’ll film something. For now… let’s just get this over and done with,” I suggested.

For weeks to come, our fans would speculate over the sudden mood change in the video.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ocean tests her parents.  
> blughdughdfk

~ Ocean ~

I decided to test them. Will they allow my impromptu performance into the video? Or will they edit it out? I was almost certain it would be the latter, but I wanted to know for sure before I took the next step in my plan.

I opened my laptop to YouTube and created an account with my Gmail. Names, names, names… Ocean_Howell_Lester. If anyone stumbles across that, well - I laughed, imagining the storm the fans would create. As a final touch, I made my profile photo a picture of myself with Clara and the cover image one with my parents.

That done, I quickly brought up Dad and Papa’s channels, and sat there refreshing their pages constantly. When nothing was there after two or three hours, I started to feel a little deflated - until I noticed the link to their Twitter pages. I clicked on it, a feeling of anticipation growing in my stomach. Time slowed, and the wifi slowed with it. Bit by bit, the page loaded, and the last part to load was Dad’s pinned tweet - New Gaming Video : Dil’s Anniversary! Dan and Phil Play Sims 4 #154. 

It was now or never.

The video loaded slowly, with lots of buffering. 

“Hello, DanAndPhilGAMES cake monsters!” 

I skipped forward, through scenes I saw before, until a few seconds before my entrance. I waited, holding my breath… 

“Sorry guys, I think the software we were using crashed there, so we missed a couple of minutes of footage. Basically what happened was …” I tuned out, my body going numb. They’d edited me out. The fans still didn’t know. They edited me out.

That was it. The last straw. I hurriedly scrolled down to the comments and typed ‘I can’t believe you. Why don’t you want the world to know about me?’. I grabbed the bag I’d packed earlier, pulled on my shoes and stepped out into the cold London night.

❀ ~ ❀ Later ❀ ~ ❀ ~ Phil ~

Dan and I hadn’t seen Ocean for a couple of hours, but that didn’t worry us. She often left without warning, and would return in the evening after exploring the area with Clara.

“Dan, I feel bad about editing her out. What are we going to tell her? What would have happened if we left it in?” I said sadly.

“We’ll tell her about our plans to make a video. If we’d left it in, imagine how the phandom would react - about twenty times worse than the Valentine’s Day video,” Dan replied placatingly. “Besides … PHIL!”

“What, Bear?” I looked up in worry.

“I just had an idea! What if, when we’re ready, we make a video that starts with her… performance? And then finish it off with an explanation! I know I kept that part of the footage.” Dan said excitedly.

That sounded … “Okay. We’ll see.” I said uncertainly, but grinned when I saw his expression. “We’ll see,” I repeated with more confidence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the suspense!  
> ily guys <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the shitstorm erupts, my friends  
> brace yourselves

~ Ocean ~

I sip at my hot chocolate, gazing out at the night sky through the Starbucks window. I was never really a coffee person, which was funny considering how little sleep I, or rather my parents and therefore me, got. 

I had no idea what I was going to do. Should I go to the Sivans and just hobbit it out for the next few days? Or should I just leave altogether?

Leaving, it seemed, was the only logical option. And so I started to walk.

I walked past the green, past the little green, past the church, past the pools, past the stadium until I’d left behind everything I knew and my feet ached. I gazed around. Before me was a maze, a tangle of buildings and paths and lampposts and cafes and clouds and signs and people and I was lost and dizzy and crying and I just kept walking. I just kept walking.

 

~ Dan ~

We were getting worried now. Clara hadn’t heard from her since she’d come home, we couldn’t track her phone because it must have been turned off, and it was getting dark. I shivered at the thought. Who knows what happens in London at night? Not me, that’s for sure. I was still that full-time internet hobo who only went outside to film ‘A Day in the Life’ videos.

I texted around all our friends (which to be entirely honest, wasn’t a very long list) to keep an eye out for her … and then I scrolled past one name. Dylan. Why the hell do I still have his number?

I shrugged it off and continued scrolling.

PJ … sent. Louise … sent. Joe … sent. 

I looked up at the sound of footsteps as Phil walked into the lounge. 

“Where could she be, d’ya think?” he asked again. “She’s not at Clara’s, and she doesn’t hang out with anyone else because she … oh god, we don’t let her see anyone else! She literally can only talk to Clara. Dan, what have we done?” He looked at me despairingly.

“Phil, she’ll be fine,” I reassured him. “I think she just wanted to get away from it all for a little -” I was cut off by a flurry of ping!s from my phone. “What the hell?” Phil’s phone was doing the same.

I reached over to it, and saw that my Twitter had been flooded with messages tagging me and that #DanAndPhilWho’sThis was trending worldwide. My stomach dropped, my body realising what was happening before my brain. I opened one message, containing only a screenshot and an image of 15-year-old Ocean smiling next to us in Hawaii:

Ocean_Howell_Lester: I can’t believe you. Why don’t you want the world to know about me?

The rest were all along the lines of ‘DAN WHO IS THIS’ and ‘OMG ARE YOU NOT TELLING US SOMETHING’ and other various forms of the same question : who the hell is Ocean Howell-Lester? No one knew, that was the point. 

But now they did, and we had to explain. And we couldn’t do it without Ocean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! might take a while for the next few chapters to be uploaded as I've just realised I've only written up to chapter nine... oops  
> will write some more when i stop p̶h̶o̶t̶o̶s̶h̶o̶p̶p̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶m̶y̶s̶e̶l̶f̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶i̶r̶ ̶s̶e̶l̶f̶i̶e̶s̶ procrastinating


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ocean meets someone who is so much more than she could ever have guessed.

~ Ocean ~

I handed over the coins, a desperate ‘I’m totally okay’ smile on my face. The dark-haired worker studied me with concern, but handed me my fourth club sandwich anyway. I walked back to my table, head lowered, and sat heavily. I bit into the sandwich with a sob, because I was lost, lost, lost. I didn’t want to use my phone to find my way home - I knew Dad and Papa could track me. I looked up into the eyes of the worker, who had walked over and was saying, “Hey, what’s going on?”

“Er, yeah … I’m just a bit lost, which is ridiculous because I’ve lived here my entire life but I don’t go outside which is why I’m lost not even twenty minutes away from home and oh my god I’m so sorry for dumping this all on you…” I rambled, tears rolling down my cheeks again.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, it’s okay. What’s going on, man? That’s your fourth sandwich. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone order a fourth club sandwich,” the man said with a chuckle.

“Stress-eating,” I supplied sheepishly. “My parents… well not many people know about me, and I guess… I just kind of wanted out.” 

A flash of something crossed his face, something I didn’t recognise. Was that sympathy? Or something closer to recognition?

“What’s your name, Miss-Four-Sandwiches? Can I help you get home? I’m Dylan, by the way - call me Dyl,” he said with a grin.

“Nice to meet you, Dyl. I’m Ocean. And uh, yeah, if you could that would be absolutely fantastic… I live near the Starbucks on Upper Street, do you know it?” I replied awkwardly.

“I’ll stick with Four-Sandwiches. Yeah, I used to live around there too.” 

“Could you… do you think you could drop me off? You’ve really helped me - I mean, four sandwiches and being so nice! - and I’d like you to, uh, meet my parents. Partly because you’re so nice and they’d like to thank you and also because I kinda want them to feel, well, bad I guess because they didn’t want to help and you did and oh my god I’m such a bad person,” I said, a torrent of words pouring from my mouth. Verbal diarrhea, my correspondence tutor used to say.

Dylan laughed outright at that. “Yeah, sure, I don’t mind. Anything for a customer, even one who stress eats club sandwiches at 3am.” I grinned at that, wiping at any remaining tear-stains on my face.

~ Dylan ~

I glanced at her in the rear view mirror, watching as we drove into familiarity how she relaxed, her eyes softening and losing that deer-in-headlights look and her mouth curling up at the corners. 

“Left here,” she said suddenly, pointing to a small-ish side street. My stomach dropped. This street. I watched Ocean’s gaze carefully, watching how it settled on one apartment in particular. They might have moved out, right? It might not be the same tenants. I mean, how likely is it that anyone would stay in the same place for so long? 

I pulled over at her nod, and she started speaking.

“So, um, my parents … I’m adopted, so they’re not really my parents … but anyway you might know them? I don’t know, apparently they’re internet famous but -” I let out a gasp, and she cut herself off. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t - I’m sorry, I can’t meet your parents. They, um, I mean, I … I’m sorry, I can’t do this. It’s just too hard to explain, I didn’t know about …” I trailed off, not making any sense even to myself. “I have no idea where I was going with that sentence. Will you forgive me if I don’t come with you?” I pleaded. My stomach rolled at the thought of having to meet … them.

I watched her reaction carefully, and as I saw her shoulders droop I relented. “Okay, okay, I’ll come with you,” I said reluctantly. I noticed she was still confused and worried, but I shook it off and stood taller. “Let’s go.”

She walked up to the front door and rang the buzzer, and I braced myself for the faces behind the door. I heard rushed footsteps, the click of a lock and then the world slowed as the door swung open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thank you so much for the positive feedback <3 It means so much to me! I'll see if I can write some more this weekend - I have another almost complete chapter to post tomorrow (maybe) but I'll see what I have to work with.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to be written! I finally decided to finish it whilst not studying for an English exam. Great use of my time.

~ Dan ~

My heart stopped as I heard the buzzer. Who was it? I glanced at Phil, who nodded, and I exploded from the couch and ran down to the front door, Phil not far behind. I unlocked the door with trepidation, and took a deep breath before opening the door. The first thing I saw was Ocean. I grinned, but it faltered when the door continued to open further and my eyes found…  
Dylan.  
The moment he saw our faces, he froze, then rushed forward to envelope the both of us in a massive bear hug. 

I heard Ocean’s hysterical voice behind me.  
“What is going on? Dad? Papa? What the hell, Dyl?”   
I looked over to her and replied shakily, “Let’s go into the lounge … we all have some explaining to do.”

~

I waited until everyone was settled before I started speaking. “So… this is awkward. Um - Ocean, you obviously know Dylan … Howell-Lester.” Her hands flew to her mouth in shock.

“No….” she breathed. “What?” A tangle of emotions flitted across her face, and my heart wrenched as she struggled with the fact that the kind stranger who helped her was none other than the brother she’d never known. “You have got to be… This is some kind of joke, isn’t it? You’re just messing with me, making me feel bad… right? Right?” 

“No, Ocean,” Phil said gently. “We adopted Dylan when he was 10, and … wow.” He look at me.

“We’re crap parents, aren’t we?” I snorted, but quickly stopped when I saw Phil’s glare. “Sorry!”

“Anyway, we adopted Dyl and then when he was 14 he ran away as well.” Phil looked over and addressed Dylan, eyes glistening. “We never heard from you again! Do you know how bad we felt? What you put us through?”

“I couldn’t … I didn’t have the guts to do what Ocean here did, but I just couldn’t live with being invisible. I re-started my life, got a job and everything. I’ve even got a degree! I had to change my name and everything. Once I found out how big this was, I still couldn’t ruin it for you and so I just … re-invented myself. And part of that meant pretending you didn’t exist, either,” Dylan finished softly. My heart clenched.

Throughout all this, Ocean watched quietly, her mind whirring as everything slowly clicked into place. ‘Adopted kids’. Her eyes widened slowly, but quickly narrowed again.

“Let’s make a video.”

~

Reader’s POV

A cheery “Hello Internet!” starts the video, and Phil chimes in with “Hi guys!”  
“So today, we’ve got something really, really important to tell you.”  
The film cuts to a shot of Dan’s bedroom door.  
“So you see this door, right? This is Dan’s bedroom door, right? But do you see this lock, here? And how there’s not one on my room?” Phil narrates. “That’s because … this is actually our office. Dan has kept this room done up for twenty years, but the room I film in is our room. That’s right, we share a room. But what about the office upstairs, you ask?”  
The camera swings around, and moves towards the old gaming room.  
Dan continues the narration. “This room … this is Ocean’s room.”  
The video switches to them sitting on Phil’s - their - bed.  
“So today, guys, we’re here to talk to you about keeping secrets, and the effect it has on people. We know this first hand … because today we’re joined by two of them.” The film ripples, and suddenly there are two new people on the bed. One is a young girl, fifteen or sixteen, and the other is a young man, maybe in his late twenties. You frown in confusion.  
The young girl speaks first. “Hello everyone. You’re probably wondering who I am. My name is Ocean.” Your stomach flips - wasn’t that the girl from #DanAndPhilWho’sThis? You focus back on the screen as Phil starts talking again.

“I know what you’re thinking. Twelve years too late, we’d like to introduce you to Ocean Howell-Lester. We adopted her twelve years ago, when she was four years old, and unfortunately we have been keeping her a secret from all of you. As for this guy over here,” Phil gestures to the young man, who waves, “This is Dylan, who we call Dyl. We may or may not have named him after Dil Howlter.” Dan laughs at this and nods in sheepish confirmation. 

“We adopted Dyl when he was 10, but we also kept him a secret from you. He ran away when he was 14. This - keeping our family a secret from you - is what drove Dyl to leave us and restart his life 13 years ago, and Ocean to run away a few days ago.” Dan’s voice faltered, but he carried on. He turned to Ocean and said, “We’ve actually been married since we adopted Dyl.” 

Phil took over and addressed the camera. “You may remember a few weeks ago, in our Sims video, there were ‘technical difficulties’ and we lost a couple minutes of footage. This is what actually happened.” 

The video cuts to the Sims video, which you’ve seen. You know what’s coming - a jumpcut and profuse apologies - but the footage continues, and as the anniversary party starts, Ocean jumps into the camera’s view and starts talking.

“Hey everyone! My name is Ocean Howell-Lester. What’s this I hear? Are you asking who the hell I am?

Phil interrupts her with a cautioning “Ocean…” but she continued her impromptu performance.

“I am 16. Dan and Phil here, your beloved platonic brotp, adopted me twelve years ago. That’s right! They’ve been keeping their marriage, and my entire existence, a secret from you for TWELVE FREAKING YEARS. How does that make you feel? How do you think that makes me feel? I’ll just leave you with this: they’ve lied to you.” With that, she flounced out of the room.

The film cuts back to the previous scene, and Dan starts talking. 

“So yeah … that happened. We had to cut that out so that you lot wouldn’t freak -” he gestured vaguely at the camera, “- and we could put up an actual explanation. Ocean wasn’t too happy with being edited out, and posted that fabulous comment that started a complete and utter shitstorm on Twitter. Thanks, Ocean.”  
Ocean smirks at that and simpered innocently, “It was my first time on YouTube, I didn’t know that would happen!” Dyl chuckled.

Phil interrupts again. “I think we should end this. Dan, take it away with your waffly and deep conclusion.”

“Okay! So basically, don’t lie to your kids or they’ll give your fans a heart attack and run away. No, I’m kidding. This generally doesn’t happen - I hope - but basically we were two massive idiots with no people skills and we didn’t tell Ocean and Dyl until it was too late and we thought we’d lost them. Thank you for sticking with us for all these years, guys.” He salutes the camera, and it goes dark.

Pictures start flashing, a beautiful montage of memories. Dan and Phil with a young Dylan at Starbucks, in New Zealand, at the O2. A small Ocean sitting under a tree in the park, Phil pushing her on a swing, a beach in Hawaii. A tear slides down your cheek.

It jumps back to the four on the bed, Dan asking, “Wait - Ocean - how did you find our channels?” She leans over and whispers something in his ear, a cheeky grin on her face. His eyes widen, and he yells dramatically at the camera.

“CLARAAAAA!”

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is my first fic! I'd appreciate feedback if you've got something to say or improve :) I've already got a few chapters written, so I'll try upload them regularly while I finish it off. They're also a bit short, but oh well (I'm not good at writing long chapters haha)


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